Funny Business

Driving home from camp. Listening to Lite 105 or B101 or some station that plays older music, not just the current hits that the kids are used to. After a while, Andrew declares, "Mom, most of these songs are kinda stupid. How can there be clouds in someone's eyes and how can she hear his body talk?"

Andrew is busy shooting hoops. Mom: "Andrew, please help me carry the bags into the house." Andrew: "Mom, I'm just trying to get the most out of my childhood!"

Andrew: "Can I have a plain bagel with cream cheese?"
Mom: "You should add more fruit to your diet!"
Andrew, groaning: "Fine, give me a raising bagel then."

Funny business

Mom pulls up Sasha's pants. Sasha pulls them back down, gives Mom a hard look, and says, pulling the pants all the way up, "Mom, THIS . . . is not my style!"

Mom says to Andrew: "Andrew, I never know what to expect from you! You're like a box of chocolates." Andrew replies, "No, Mom, I'm like a bag of crazy beans!"

Mom is telling kids about her childhood. She asks, "Do you think I'm old?" Andrew, attempting to make Mom feel young, "No, Mom. If I saw you on the street, I'd think you were just born."

Funny business

Andrew: You know why I would never want to be a ghost? You wouldn't be able to sleep because you would see through your eyelids. Also, you can't eat because the food would just go through you and you would starve to death. You wouldn't be able to pick anything up or touch anyone. So, I'm not afraid of ghosts.

Andrew: Mom, you know what would make me nervous when I grow up? Being a class president.
Mom: Why?
Andrew: Well, I would have to give a lot of speeches, and that makes me nervous.

Funny business

Mom bought Sasha a shirt that says "Sweet and Sassy". Sasha, smelling fruit snacks, "Mmmm... Smells sweet and sassy!"

Sasha, to Andrew: "Andrew, stop acting so stupendous!"

Funny business

Sasha, after taking a sip of water: "Am I, like, hydrated?"

Andrew, to Sasha: "Shut up!!!"
Mom: "Could you say that in a nicer way?
Andrew: "Please shut your trap!"

Sasha is looking at a book illustration depicting a beach scene. A mother is holding a baby's hand. The baby is naked. Sasha, pointing at the baby's genitals: "So inappropriate!"