Mommie is helping Sasha in the bathroom. Andrew yells from the bedroom, "Mommie, I'm sure Sasha is done already!" Mommie: "Andrew, worry about yourself, please!" Andrew: "Mommie, you're supposed to say, 'Mind your own business!'"
-Andrew, I'm sorry I parked the car so close to a tree.
-That's OK, Mommie, I still love you!
- Andrew, did you break off a piece of wood from our TV stand?
- No, a bad guy comed in our house and did it.
-Andrew did you take a nap in daycare today?
-Yes
-Was it a long nap?
Points from one end of room with his index finger to the other: "This long"!
-Andrew, you're driving me so crazy, I don't know what my name is anymore!
-Incredulously: "It's Ira!"
-Sasha, you're my princess!
-No, I'm Daddy's princess.
-You're my sweetheart!
-OK.
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About Me
- Ira
- o I enjoy shocking people o I’ve always wanted an older brother o I like the sound and smell of fire o I wish I had a magic carpet because I love traveling o I detest literary theory and sci-fi o Bluntness and kept promises instill trust o Dance is proof of music’s immense power o Fake modesty and feigned interest irk me o I remember a vacation my family took when I was three o I have always loved trying on shoes o The most disgusting food I was force-fed was skin off a chicken leg o I don’t like surprises or occasion presents, yet love unpredictability and gifts for no reason o I need to have “alone time” o I prefer simple to outrageous; complicated to boring o I like checklists and agendas, but rarely follow them o I resent menus in foreign languages but adore ethnic cuisine o I change my mind o Old people often approach me o I am stubborn and can only learn from own mistakes o Intimate conversations win over loud parties o Amusement-park rides don’t agree with me o I like my coffee strong and chocolate dark o No artificial sweetener or bacon o Not too many ruffles or flowers o No hotel art or paisley pattern
